To do List Thursdays: Emotionally Unavailable Men (Not to Do)

 So, I fake dated this guy for a little over a year. I call it that because it was by no means real.  To the outside world, he looked good on paper. We were in the same field of work, he liked music, he coached girls high school basketball, knew a lot of people and had a knack for always being there for others when they needed him.  This was all a fantasy, an illusion, a wolf in sheep's clothing and a phony.  To know him only on a friend level, he was a good guy, but to really know him, intimately, he was selfish, negative and manipulative. His conversations were dominated by him and his endeavors. He never asked about me, my goals, my future. When I did get a word in edge wise, he seemed like he wasn't paying attention.

While dating, he would always put others first. At the drop of a dime, he would be there for his "boys" or any of his friends that needed help. They would call on him, he would be there in a heartbeat. But me..nawww, I was second ,who am I fooling, 20th.

 My eyes were opened last year when I had surgery.  I was out of work for  six weeks and was not allowed to drive. Did mister care about my well being or recovery? Not really. He wasn't there like he should have been- even when he had a key to my place. Now I understand that men think differently than women, but at least a "friend" would see you needed anything (from the store), maybe take you out for fresh air (because you were couped up for a minute). None of this was done by my so called man (with a key might I add).

 I painfully came to the realization that he was emotionally unavailable- to me at least.  This is very much a real phenomenon amongst people, men  in particular according to comments, topics and discussions from a page I "liked" on face book called-Baggage Reclaim. I learned that I am not alone on this topic. There are a lot of men who just don't know how to give emotionally.  We as women have to take the stance of knowing when our gut is talking. It's called  red flags and we have to start taking heed to those uncomfortable feelings inside.  When something doesn't feel right, 9 times out of 10, it's not. My lesson- to ask more questions while in relationships and let my inner self guide the way.

Dating an Emotional Unavilable guy is Not a to do....on my list


Good night people